"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heavens." Ecclesiastes 3:1

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

I Miss You

I miss you.
As I typed those words to Buddy this morning, I had a lump in my throat. Instead of hitting send on that short but meaningful message, I kept typing...

I miss you.  I keep daydreaming about you showing up at our door with flowers and reservations for a weekend away. I wish I could push away the desire for such things; I know the reality is that we cannot afford them (much less pursue them with the kids), but my heart is heavy with desire for you. It's not just physical desire, although that is definitely part of it; it's emotional and spiritual desire too. I want a weekend away from all of the noise and stress, so we can just be together - to talk, to pray, to embrace. I miss you so much.

I started to hit send, but stopped myself. While it's true that it's been far too long since we've spent more than a couple of hours alone, I decided it was best to bring my desires to prayer.

While I prayed, God reminded me how incredibly blessed I am to have such a strong desire for my husband after almost 10 years of marriage.  Many couples these days lose that fire before their first anniversary. As much as I pray for God to change our current financial struggle, I realized that if this is the cross that we must carry at the moment, as long as we have one another, it is worth the weight (and the wait, because I am still praying this trial doesn't last forever!).

To have a husband that I love and that loves me in return is priceless. The sacrifices we must endure seem like such a small offering when I use them to give thanks to God for the gift of my husband. It may be another 10 years before he can show up with flowers and reservations for a weekend away, but as long as he is the one at the door holding the flowers, I can wait.

God made me realize that one of the many blessings of our marriage is that we miss one another. I have a husband that I love so much that I actually miss him while he is gone! The sad truth is, some marriages don't even have that much.
Buddy, the next time you get that simple text from me, I hope you feel all of the love behind those three little words. That simple I miss you is more than just another way to say, "Hey, how's it going?" It's my way of saying that this marriage of ours is worth every sacrifice - the current one being the time I have to spend away from the one I love.

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